Who Teaches You Sexually?

I hate the sexual fantasies that run through my head…and I hate myself for having them! It makes me sick to think about ever acting on them, but I can’t seem to get rid of them and I don’t understand why they keep coming back. Understanding and navigating our sexuality is often a challenging and […]

Sexual Styles of Relating for Men

Most guys desire to experience a passionate and free sexual life but are often unaware of how their own fear, shame, and frustration blocks their fulfillment. Discovering our style of relating sexually helps us to bring our true authentic self to this part of our life. Instead of fears and insecurities leading us to hold back […]

Will I Ever Get Over the Shame of My Sexual Past?

I know I am forgiven, but can I ever get over the shame of my sexual past? I do not believe any of us makes it through life without some experience of sexual shame. We often hide this part of ourselves believing our sexual desires are somehow wrong or just not normal. We hide because […]

Who Cares for the Sexual Lives of Men?

My dad was a private man when it came to sexual issues. I did find some of his Playboys growing up. And me and my friends used to joke about what we saw and what we wanted to do with the women. I guess, with my dad, I learned to keep most of my sexual […]

Do Men Do Intimacy Differently?

“Men move toward whatever makes them feel competent,” and sitting down to talk about feelings generally doesn’t fit the bill. However, this does not mean that men do not do intimacy or are simply not good at it. It means we must expand our understanding of intimacy and how we go about achieving it. For […]

Are You a Digger or a Disher?

“I assumed if she wanted to know more about me she would ask. She didn’t, so I assumed she didn’t care to know any more.” –The Digger  “I assumed if he had something to share he would. He didn’t, so I assumed he was either disconnected from his emotions or didn’t have anything else to […]

Freeing Eros for Agape

For many Christians, eros stands in stark opposition to agape forms of love. Eros is viewed from many pulpits as a natural, selfish drive that must be carefully managed and is only rightly satisfied (or better tolerated) in marriage, while agape is seen as the spiritual, higher, sacrificial giving love that all Christians are to […]

The Difficult Road to a Championship Marriage

Why is marriage so hard? If we love each other shouldn’t things just click? Did we make a mistake in choosing to marry each other? The experience of marriage can be hard and this is in part by design. While marriage is not meant to make us feel miserable and hopeless, it is part of […]

Become a Marriage Mentor

It’s exciting and mildly terrifying to start this path of marriage. I love my parents, but wish we had someone to talk to who wouldn’t try to parent us, and who could also be more personal than professional counseling. A young couple embarking on the journey of marriage would benefit greatly from having an older […]

When You Married Your Opposite

Very often, the man I married (a.k.a. my annoyinghusband) drives me absolutely bonkers. And I do mean absolutely. But each time that I not-so-gently inform him of this detail, his response never fails to bring a smile. Me: Eyes wide and gesturing wildly with my hands, “SERIOUSLY, YOU MAKE ME CRAZY!”  Him: Cool and collected as […]