Can We Acknowledge Each Other as Sexual Beings?

Musings on Our Neutered Imago Dei

It is rather easy to acknowledge our social sexuality, our gender as males and females. What is much harder to affirm is that our friends, our neighbors, and our coworkers actually also have genitals and erotic desires. For many, this thought provokes much discomfort. In many respects, we seem to prefer our acquaintances neutered or […]

Freeing Eros for Agape

For many Christians, eros stands in stark opposition to agape forms of love. Eros is viewed from many pulpits as a natural, selfish drive that must be carefully managed and is only rightly satisfied (or better tolerated) in marriage, while agape is seen as the spiritual, higher, sacrificial giving love that all Christians are to […]

“Embodiment Matters | Prof. Kayb Joseph”
by Covenant College


November 23, 2015

Given the amount of body shaming and objectification present in our culture, Professor Kayb Joseph of Covenant College offers some challenging and timely thoughts.

While we have a fantastic theology of the body available to us in the Bible, we hear little about it beyond what the church tells us our bodies are not for. Little attention is given to what they are for. Thus, our bodies have become isolated in our culture. We have become suspicious of touch and the body communal. With great difficulty, we attempt to live out an embodied experience without an understanding of what it means to be soul enfleshed. We do not understand that Christian spirituality is not freedom from the body, but freedom within the body. That Christ’s embodiment dignifies and exemplifies this for us.

How can we reimagine the body in a positive and Christian way? What would it look like to engage in countercultural acts of image-making that affirm our embodied existence?

Listen to the full chapel address below:

The Nature of Sexual Fantasies

“More Than a Cigar”

I have never told my wife or anyone about my sexual fantasies. They are too dark and perverted. I don’t understand them and wish I didn’t have these recurring thoughts. It can be embarrassing to share our private sexual thoughts with another. What will he think? What if I really am messed up? Will she […]

Freedom of Sexual Fantasies

I’m concerned about my husband’s use of fantasies during our sexual encounters. He says he can no longer finish [climax] without relying on them. Are all sexual fantasies bad? God has created us with a powerful mind. We are able to think, imagine, and enrich the joy in our lives with many new and creative […]

What does the Bible say about Lust?

Biblical Gender Roles
April 18, 2014

For many Christian men, the sin of lust has been defined as merely finding a woman attractive, and certainly if he becomes sexually aroused by her beauty. To avoid this sin, men have told me, for example, about their attempts to keep their eyes on the floor when they walk through a store. This was their heroic effort to prevent the possibility of even seeing an attractive woman, and thus lusting after her.

While part of me applauds their efforts to avoid sin at all cost, another deeper part of me wonders if this represents the abundant and free life Christ came to offer us (and modeled for us).

As mentioned in Affected by Beauty, I believe we can celebrate the beauty of the human form and allow it to affect us without sinning.

The article linked above seeks to understand lust Biblically and not simply how the modern Christian community has interpreted it. It is a thoughtful reflection that is worth considering.

In short, the case is made that Lust = Covetousness

Covetousness is defined as “the strong desire to possess something that is belongs to another.”

The article concludes that,

The sin [of lust] only comes when your sexual attraction…turns into a covetous desire to possess her sexually outside of marriage.

As such, it is not sin to simply be attracted to the beauty in another or even to be aroused by that beauty.

While we are called to fight against sin, it is not beneficial to fight against how God has designed us. God has designed us to be attracted to and affected by beauty. This is not an excuse to be rude, gawk, or otherwise make women feel uncomfortable. However, there is also no need for shame when you get feelings of pleasure from being in the presence of beauty.

 

Pornography and the Mutually Consenting Couple

Editor’s Notes: Originally posted on Enhancing the Dance. See followup comments here. I’m (Dr. Jessica McCleese) excited to take this opportunity to introduce you to a colleague of mine. We met while I was pursuing training as a sexual educator. Corey has worked directly with Dr. Doug Rosenau, author of A Celebration of Sex, and multiple training programs […]