Sexual Styles of Relating for Men

Most guys desire to experience a passionate and free sexual life but are often unaware of how their own fear, shame, and frustration blocks their fulfillment. Discovering our style of relating sexually helps us to bring our true authentic self to this part of our life. Instead of fears and insecurities leading us to hold back […]

Can We Acknowledge Each Other as Sexual Beings?

Musings on Our Neutered Imago Dei

It is rather easy to acknowledge our social sexuality, our gender as males and females. What is much harder to affirm is that our friends, our neighbors, and our coworkers actually also have genitals and erotic desires. For many, this thought provokes much discomfort. In many respects, we seem to prefer our acquaintances neutered or […]

Erotic by His Design

“I feel bad for wanting sex so often. I know there are more important things in life. What can I do to reduce my sexual urges?” It is true sex dominates the lives of many men. And for some it has become the most important thing, defining their very self-worth and relational success. At the same […]

Freedom of Sexual Fantasies

I’m concerned about my husband’s use of fantasies during our sexual encounters. He says he can no longer finish [climax] without relying on them. Are all sexual fantasies bad? God has created us with a powerful mind. We are able to think, imagine, and enrich the joy in our lives with many new and creative […]

Men, Sex, and Shame – Part 2

“A problem cannot be resolved until it has been faced.” –Dr. Dan Allender Is it possible that everyone, male and female, young and old, has been sexually abused? Would this help explain the prevalence of sexual shame for men? Sexual abuse can be defined as any behavior, attitude, or response that hinders normal sexual development. Our […]

The Cost of Silence

Sexual sins are often considered an individual issue. The person alone bears the guilt and stands in need of repentance, or so the thinking goes. Without removing individual accountability, I believe we as the body of Christ also bear some of the responsibility when one of our members falls into sin. We are called to […]

Sexual Idol or Icon?

God has created an altogether wonderful and utterly fascinating world. We get to enjoy majestic mountains and curvaceous slopes, hidden ravines and luscious gardens with the choicest of fruit. What’s more, we get to delight in the crown of creation through the beauty of the human form, our bodies, souls, and spirits. Through creation the […]

God-Reflective Sexuality

The full beauty and goodness of our sexuality can be experienced when we know its purpose. And in fact, many sexual frustrations seem to be the result of missing its created design. It is good for us then to simply pause and consider why God created sexuality, remembering that our sexuality is more about who […]