The Thrill of Hope is for Sex Too

O Holy Night is one of my favorite songs at Christmas. This year it reminded me our hope in Christ also includes the renewal of our sexuality. As men, we desperately need hope here. O holy night! The stars are brightly shining,  It is the night of our dear Savior’s birth. Long lay the world […]

Who Teaches You Sexually?

I hate the sexual fantasies that run through my head…and I hate myself for having them! It makes me sick to think about ever acting on them, but I can’t seem to get rid of them and I don’t understand why they keep coming back. Understanding and navigating our sexuality is often a challenging and […]

Sexual Styles of Relating for Men

Most guys desire to experience a passionate and free sexual life but are often unaware of how their own fear, shame, and frustration blocks their fulfillment. Discovering our style of relating sexually helps us to bring our true authentic self to this part of our life. Instead of fears and insecurities leading us to hold back […]

Who Cares for the Sexual Lives of Men?

My dad was a private man when it came to sexual issues. I did find some of his Playboys growing up. And me and my friends used to joke about what we saw and what we wanted to do with the women. I guess, with my dad, I learned to keep most of my sexual […]

Freeing Eros for Agape

For many Christians, eros stands in stark opposition to agape forms of love. Eros is viewed from many pulpits as a natural, selfish drive that must be carefully managed and is only rightly satisfied (or better tolerated) in marriage, while agape is seen as the spiritual, higher, sacrificial giving love that all Christians are to […]

Embracing the Bittersweet Transitions of Life

How exciting it must be to get married, to see your kids leave for college, or to finally reach the time of retirement! All true, and yet these times can also bring sadness. The transitions of life are often bittersweet. While there can be great anticipation as we move into the next stages of life, […]

Become a Marriage Mentor

It’s exciting and mildly terrifying to start this path of marriage. I love my parents, but wish we had someone to talk to who wouldn’t try to parent us, and who could also be more personal than professional counseling. A young couple embarking on the journey of marriage would benefit greatly from having an older […]

Empower Your Marriage with Grace

“I’m so sorry, Sweetie, I slipped up again.” It can be difficult to know how to respond when our spouse’s actions negatively affect us. We want to be gracious people, as God has been gracious to us, but we also don’t want our grace to be taken advantage of and used as an excuse for […]

It’s Not My Job to Grow Up My Spouse

The following insights are some of the hardest but most valuable interpersonal lessons I’ve learned over time… It’s not my job to “grow up” my husband. That’s God’s job. Realizing that my role in life and in my relationships, first and foremost, is to allow God to grow ME up has freed me from over-focusing on others. […]

Addiction and Grace: Love and Spirituality in the Healing of Addictions

From Amazon:

Addiction and Grace offers an inspiring and hope–filled vision for those who desire to explore the mystery of who and what they really are. May examines the “processes of attachment” that lead to addiction and describes the relationship between addiction and spiritual awareness. He also details the various addictions from which we can suffer, not only to substances like alcohol and drugs, but to work, sex, performance, responsibility, and intimacy.

Drawing on his experience as a psychiatrist working with the chemically dependent, May emphasizes that addiction represents an attempt to assert complete control over our lives. Addiction and Grace is a compassionate and wise treatment of a topic of major concern in these most addictive of times, one that can provide a critical yet hopeful guide to a place of freedom based on contemplative spirituality.