For many couples, talking openly about their sexual life can be difficult. Even if they are making love on a regular basis, few sit down and have a thoughtful discussion about this private side of life. Sharing our intimate desires and activities can be uncomfortable, and this may be truer with our spouse, as it is hard to hide from the person closest to us. It takes time to grow into and experience truly being naked and without shame in marriage.
When things are going well the absence of talking may not be a big deal. However, not regularly having an open and honest dialogue can cause underlying problems to linger, and eventually worsen (Male Sexual Problems/Female Sexual Problems). Talking about sex is part of our faithful stewardship in marriage, allowing us to address any problems and continue growing into our sexual best.
Many couples are willing to have these conversations, they just don’t know where to begin. In response to this need, I compiled a list of questions to help couples jumpstart the conversation.
Download your Free PDF of Let’s Talk About S-E-X Questions!
The first few questions are designed to help couples begin to think through their theology of sexuality. Often we engage in this wonderful, though mysterious, dance of the sexes without ever stopping to consider its purpose and why God created it. The list goes on to address issues of frequency, preferences, our feelings toward sex, sexual language, and other practical concerns.
Our sexuality is very complex and can stir up many deep emotions. Sometimes these emotions get the best of us and we can unintentionally say hurtful and painful things to our spouse. Take your time as you go through the questions (maybe over coffee one Saturday morning). Do your part to make this a rewarding experience for both you and your spouse.
Many couples find it beneficial to meet with a counselor as they go through these discussions. A counselor helps the conversation stay on track when emotions run high, moving toward greater intimacy.
Is it time for you to talk about sex in your marriage? Download your free guide above and start the conversation.
Would you benefit from having this conversation with a certified Christian sex therapist? Schedule your appointment today.