Many things are exactly as they appear on the surface, no more or no less. But sometimes what is seen points to a larger reality, much like an icon or symbol. And we’re prone to miss the deeper meanings present when we take everything as strictly literal.
There’s a psychoanalytic quote that suggests sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, while at other times it’s a phallic symbol. On the one hand, it’s a warning not to read too much into things. Many times the best approach is to accept things at face value.
But the quote also suggests that occasionally a cigar is more than just a cigar. It is, in fact, a symbol representing something else entirely. And we remain blind to the rest of the story when all we can see is the cigar.
Many of our desires and fantasies work in a similar way, sexual or otherwise. For instance, childhood fantasies about flying might suggest more of a desire for freedom than a career path toward becoming a pilot per se. And fantasies about being rich and famous might simply be the desire for meaningful power and influence.
Likewise, sexual fantasies about a coworker might reflect our deeper desires for comfort and acceptance rather than an actual physical relationship with this person. And a fascination with sexual body parts might relate more to the generative power of these parts rather than a concrete lusting after them.
Whatever it looks like, we frustrate ourselves when we misinterpret the meaning of the “cigar” in our lives. To be sure, we don’t have to act on it even if it is a literal desire. But seeing its true meaning gives us the freedom to fully embrace its deeper truth.
In the end, there’s much wisdom in accepting things at face value. But consider also when what is seen is more symbolic than literal – when a cigar is more than just a cigar.
