There are aspects to our story we might wish to keep hidden in the shadows – believing the lie of shame that we would be utterly rejected by others if these ever saw the light of day. But this fear of discovery robs us of our freedom and blocks the very love and belonging we desire. We must learn to courageously face our shadows to have them redeemed, rather than making ever-elaborate fig leaves to keep ourselves hidden.
To be fair, the embarrassing sins of our youth are often kept in the shadows. And we prefer to keep them in the past because these are no longer things we engage in anymore. We want to keep our eyes forward toward who we are becoming today and not on who we were yesterday. And there’s much wisdom here.
But moving forward doesn’t mean we avoid or otherwise ignore our past. Denial is not freedom. As such, we become enslaved to keeping our secrets. We don’t want it to get out and so we twist and turn ourselves into all sorts of relational knots to keep them hidden. But, like the body having to compensate for a broken limb, our overcompensation in hiding eventually distorts how we show up in the rest of our life and relationships.
Instead of denial it’s better to integrate our shadow. But this is not to whitewash the sin –bringing it into the light only to pretend it’s okay. Rather it’s to have our sinful desires redeemed and restored back to their proper place in God’s economy. For instance, we do not tolerate illicit sexual expressions, but a redeemed desire might reveal the true beauty, intimacy, adventure, and even holy ecstasy our souls are actually yearning for. And freedom and joy is found in learning how to integrate these deeper desires into our everyday life. Our story of redemption might then also serve as a light and comfort for others still hiding important aspects of their story.
In the end, bring the light of grace to your shadows and allow what was once shameful to be redeemed into that which now glorifies God and advances his kingdom.
Photo by Wil Stewart on Unsplash
