Part of our duty and glory as men is to protect and provide for those God has entrusted to us. And while we might often have a tough exterior, few things arouse our strength like the tender, vulnerable hearts of those we love. In this way, we are softies at heart.
To be sure, most husbands hate seeing their wife cry. And perhaps many wives struggle with allowing themselves to be so vulnerable. As such, softness is often seen as a weakness. But God has given a glory to softness, and has placed a special call within the masculine heart to respond to and protect it. And this is why tears are more likely to evoke our protective instincts.
To be fair, many times we just want the tears to stop because we don’t know what to do with them. But even this shows our sensitivity to such vulnerability.
And, of course, anger and contempt will also trigger a passionate response from us. But we’re more prone in these moments to become defensive as we try to protect our own vulnerable hearts. Instead of moving toward our wife in love, we move against or move away – seeing her either as a threat to fight or a problem to avoid.
Of course, our wife shouldn’t have to cry every time she wants us to hear and care for the things important to her. And we must often listen deeper for the tenderness of her true heart behind her moments of frustration and rage. Her anger toward us is often her way of trying to protect her own heart.
All the same, we’re simply responding as God has designed us when the softness of her tears moves us to meaningful action.
In the end, softness arouses masculine strength. Learn to see this vulnerability in your wife, even when there are no tears.
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