The demands of fatherhood are often overwhelming. Even beyond providing the basic needs for our family and building a foundation of love through our marriage, we have the moral responsibility of raising our kids in the way they should go. This means the burden of their soul formation is also on our shoulders. Learning the wisdom of a university’s dean helps us to accept this responsibility without despair.
On the one hand, a dean carries responsibility for the overall direction and integrity of the school he leads, operating within the mission set by the university’s president and governing board. He has authority while remaining under authority. All the same, his responsibility doesn’t require him to teach every class. His job is to build the faculty and guard the curriculum being taught.
In the same way, our position as dad and leader of our homes makes us responsible for the direction of our family, and specifically the formation of our kids. This is not a vision we set for ourselves, but rather the mantle of responsibility given to us by God. Our leadership remains under his divine authority. And just as the dean chooses the curriculum and appoints the right faculty, so we are most effective in our role when we do the same in raising our kids.
It should be clear that delegation is not the same as deferring. We’re not abdicating our responsibility to others, but freeing ourselves to focus on the overarching vision and mission without the need to complete every task ourselves.
For instance, perhaps schoolteachers support us in our kids’ academic formation, just as church leaders support us in their theological understanding. Different friends and family might also help us in teaching on finances, sexuality, relational skills, or the like. Whatever it looks like, we remain ultimately responsible for employing the right faculty and guarding the curriculum being taught – ensuring our kids have what they need in their journey of discipleship.
To be sure, it’s a heavy responsibility to be the steward of our kids’ souls. But this is not something we have to do alone. Take responsibility by putting in place the faculty and curriculum needed for your kids’ soul formation.
