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We typically like things that are clear and neat. And this is particularly true when it comes to our love for each other. But often we’re mixed bags, and perhaps even double minded, which makes it difficult to know which risks of love are worth it.

Of course, the ideal scenario is that we love each other perfectly with a wholehearted devotion that never fails to hit the mark. But in reality we will all fall short in our practice of love – doing things that seem to directly contradict our declaration of love. This is true in our relationship with God, and with each other.

For instance, we love God and yet we sin. And our sin doesn’t communicate that we’ve stopped loving him, though it’s clear in that moment we’re not resting in his presence and keeping our eyes fixed on him. Sin strains the relationship. And certainly love would compel us not to continue practicing in sin. But the messy reality is that these can coexist.

And this holds true in our relationship with each other as well. We can love our wife, for example, and do things that might hurt her deeply. It’s clear we’re not thinking about her best interest when we’re blinded by our sin. But this does not negate our heart toward her when we are in our right mind. Of course, this doesn’t make it any easier for her to trust our love after we’ve betrayed her.

Whether with God, our wife, or anyone else, we cannot continue living double minded. While we might rightly and humbly seek grace and mercy for our moments of weakness and sin, we cannot use this as an excuse to continue missing the mark. The sincerity of love is rightly questioned when we do.

In the end, the practice of love is often messier than we prefer. But our capacity to mess things up and still love each other is not an excuse to continue living double minded. We must continue maturing toward a wholehearted love of God and each other.

Photo by Laurence BL on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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