We’re taught to see and desire the object of our gazing. And, in this way, our very looking becomes problematic because we’ve been trained to see only as a way to fuel our heart’s desire to consume. But this often leaves us frustrated when we consistently seem to fail in our attempts to have eyes only for our wife, for example. Of course, she is singular in our heart’s devotion, humanly speaking. But this doesn’t mean we cannot see and honor the countless forms of embodied beauty God allows to grace our path. It might be said then that we have one heart and two eyes.
On the one hand, Jesus clearly warns us against all forms of adultery, including the adultery of the heart. It’s not enough to merely stop short of illicit sexual encounters when our heart is already given into these desires. And to look with this intent is sinful, whether or not we actually consummate the sexual relationship.
At the same time, it’s a mistake to assume that simply noticing the beauty of another is inherently sinful. From Sarah and Rachel, to Joseph and David, God doesn’t shy away from naming the reality of embodied beauty. Of course, many tried to take advantage of such beauty, but this remains a distortion of one’s heart and not of beauty itself.
As such, we can have one heart and two eyes. For instance, in marriage, we cultivate a monogamous heart – commiting to a life of sexual faithfulness toward our wife alone. And this fuels our eye of passionate love toward her, while also freeing us to have an eye of appreciation toward others. With God, we don’t have to shy away from acknowledging the beauty of others. Nor do we have to buy the lie of the world that the very joy of seeing exposes the true desires of our heart.
We must learn to see with pure hearts – allowing us to see and celebrate beauty in all its many forms without it dividing the deepest affections of our heart.
In the end, guard your heart without living in fear. A faithful heart doesn’t require you to deny your eyes of appreciation.
Photo by Mahesh Krishnamurthy on Unsplash
