Many have a bigger bark than bite. And perhaps this is enough in a barking contest. But more is required when a true impact is needed beyond mere appearances. This can be considered different orders of being that plays out within our masculinity as well.
First order masculinity is physically impressive. Perhaps this is in their athletic physique, strong jawline, or full beard. Or maybe it’s their success in sports, hunting, fixing cars or otherwise working with their hands. Whatever it looks like, no one questions their masculine appearance. They can clearly show up and play the part.
On the other hand, second order masculinity is more concerned with the function and substance of our masculinity. The focus here is on using our unique strength to bring more life and goodness into the world. And this can be done whether we’re the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker. Our masculinity flows from the essence of our being and it’s not dependent merely on outward appearances or stereotypical behaviors.
Of course, making this distinction is not to pit these orders against each other. While maturity does call for us to cultivate a true strength that blesses others, those who are able to model the first order form of masculinity have their own ministry as well. The bark and visual representations of masculinity tell a story and remind us of the deeper reality we’re aspiring to. At the same time, it’s pointless to just look good when we cannot also be good.
To be sure, it’s refreshing when someone is able to embody both – physically impressive and genuinely good. But thankfully the mark of mature masculinity doesn’t rest in our looks alone. And anyone who adopts a second order manhood has proven himself as a man, regardless of his appearances otherwise.
In the end, there’s value in looking the part. But more than mere appearances we must also embody the deeper essence of our masculinity – one that brings life and goodness to others.
