Most of us generally prefer to be caring rather than uncaring. But caring doesn’t mean anything goes. And we’ve neglected our duty to love when care becomes merely tolerating. To truly care is to advance the good of others. And, at times, this means we must be more confrontational than agreeable.
For instance, as husbands we’re called to care for the interest of our wives. And many times this will require us to sacrifice our agenda, desires, and preferences to bring her the good she needs. But faithfully caring for our wife is not to suggest we must satisfy her every wish. Discernment is needed.
Everything from major purchases and entertainment, to whether or not we should sleep on the couch, must all be considered from a godly perspective. While giving her what she wants will likely keep fights from escalating, we must evaluate our decision from a higher order.
Care is not focused on giving her what she wants per se; rather it seeks to secure the highest good for her. As such, a caring husband listens to his wife, but decisions are not made solely on what she wants. The caring husband keeps his eyes focused on God’s best and the ways to move his marriage and family in this direction. How does this decision advance God’s good for us?
To be sure, not getting what we want is often very disruptive – triggering many sparks and accusations. But however tempting it might be to cave in and just fake the peace, we demonstrate our true care by consistently fighting for God’s best even in the face of criticism and blame.
In the end, the caring husband seeks to fulfill God’s mandate for his marriage more than his wife’s. To accept anything less is not truly caring, regardless of who suggested it.
Photo by Omar Lopez on Unsplash
