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We don’t know what we don’t know. And part of maturity is at least recognizing that we don’t know everything and that we all have our blind spots, including with our very selves. Wisdom reminds us to surround ourselves with people who can help us to see what we would otherwise miss on our own.

Of course, we all have the responsibility to grow in our self-knowledge and understanding – becoming ever more wise and thoughtful in how we show up and engage the world.

But even this self-work is not something we can do completely on our own. We all have blind spots that keep us from seeing ourselves completely. Our habits and quirks, hidden fears and subtle approaches to life can all remain in the shadows until someone points them out for us.

In fact, others can often see parts of our story much better than we can ourselves. They have enough distance from the direct action of our lives to see a bit clearer what might be going on. Naturally, we must still evaluate their interpretations, as we’re still responsible for the choices we make. But often their insights prove to be invaluable in helping us to see and become a better version of ourselves.

For instance, we might check in with our wife and close friends to learn what it’s like to be in relationship with us. How do they experience us in relationship with them? This is not something we can know on our own. But their insights help us to improve our relationship with them.

Likewise, these reflections can also take place in a more formal setting, such as with a professional therapist or business coach. Here we might discover more about our inner world or limiting mindsets in business we otherwise miss.

Whatever it looks like, time and again we need others to help us learn what we don’t know even about ourselves.

Find your trusted others and allow them to show you your blind spots. This provides invaluable insights as we grow and mature.

Photo by Reinhart Julian on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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