Skip to main content

Often we make life too simplistic and we easily get frustrated when we cannot fit everything neatly into black or white categories. There is much wisdom in accepting life’s shades of gray, and those many times in which we must do a little of this and a little of that. At the same time, there’s a place for some things to be all or nothing.

To be sure, life regularly calls us to fight on multiple fronts simultaneously. We don’t have the luxury of dealing with just one thing at a time. But this doesn’t mean we can do everything, and we often spread ourselves too thin. Or, perhaps said another way, we try to do too much at the same time – dividing our attention and loyalty, and ultimately becoming less effective.

For instance, we might get precious little time alone with our wife. And so, on our date night we try to have all our important conversations while also simply trying to enjoy our time together. An all or nothing approach is better. When it’s time to work and focus on the business aspect of marriage, we dedicate time just for this. And when it’s time to play, no work is allowed.

Of course, this is true with our work-life balance in general as well. We tend not to do anything well when we try to do it all at the same time. Being either at work or at home allows us to be fully present wherever we are.

And this can become a point of life or death when it comes to our spiritual life as well. Our hearts cannot serve two masters. Either we give everything to God or risk being cut off from our source of life. Remember Lot’s wife!

In the end, hold multiple agendas whenever necessary, but remember the pain of straddling the fence. Sometimes it’s best to be either in or out, all or nothing.

Photo by Blake Cheek on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

Leave a Reply