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Loving well means we look out for the interest of others and not just ourselves. But this doesn’t mean we get to neglect the care of our own souls. And many times the most loving thing we can do for others is simply to choose to care for ourselves.

We don’t have to look far to find self-centered and entitled individuals who believe the world revolves around them. And we can see clearly how this immaturity doesn’t bring the life and goodness we desire.

But, as often is the case, in an effort to avoid one extreme we tend to go to the other.

Of course, we should serve and meet the needs of others every chance we get. But we must still take wisdom with us. And it remains true that we can’t pour water out of an empty cup.

In this case, choosing ourselves is not selfish, but rather a faithful stewardship before God.

We’ve been called to steward every gift God has given us, and this includes our very selves.

And part of this stewardship means prioritizing the care of our souls and doing those things that consistently restore our inner vitality.

For instance, this might mean setting boundaries and giving others the gift of No. Or it might mean proactively carving out time for ourselves and doing those things that bring us life.

Whatever it looks like, choosing ourselves is faithfully discerning how to show up with the best version of ourselves.

Even if appears selfish to others, what choice allows us to magnify love in the end?

We’re not able to love fully when we’re spread thin desperately trying to meet the expectations of others. Choosing ourselves is simply being intentional in our practice of love.

Be there for others every chance you get. And remember to love fully you must also choose yourself from time to time as well.

Photo by Warren Wong on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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