Some things we do because we want to do them. Our desires motivate us to take action. At other times, we have no natural desire and we simply decide to do what is good anyway. And such decisions are not cheapened just because they didn’t flow from our natural desires.Certainly, it’s nice when we already want to do things that will also bring others joy.
For instance, we might both enjoy taking a trip to the beach or a road trip to visit historical landmarks.
And we have no problem going along, planning, and having a good time even if it’s not something we initiated ourselves. In fact, we actually don’t think much of our efforts because it’s something we desire to do ourselves.
However, at other times, we might not care for a particular activity, but we decide to do it anyway for their sake.
And while more is required of us here, our love is not diminished just because we had to decide to do it. This might actually be a truer expression of love because we’re choosing to give up our preferences for the sake of the other.
All the same, love remains free. And for our decision to be an expression of love it must come from our free heart.
We’re not simply trying to appease the other and fake the peace while allowing bitterness and resentment to grow in our hearts. Instead, we’re freely choosing to do what brings them joy even when it comes at a cost for ourselves. And this is a cost we gladly pay.
In the end, our love is diminished when we wait on natural desires to be our only motivation.
Enjoy mutual desires whenever you can. And allow for meaningful decisions to be a true expression of your love as well.