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Life rarely flows according to our well-made plans. And more often than not things get a little messy along the way. There’s much wisdom in learning to embrace this mess.

For instance, preparing a home cooked meal usually comes at the cost of a messy kitchen. And it’s best to simply accept there will be several dirty dishes to clean along the way. 

And this is true throughout our life and relationships. A life well lived will also come with many dirty dishes.

For example, there might be seasons in which time with our friends is spotty at best, and less than ideal when it does happen. But we fight for our friendships by embracing this messiness of our schedules and not expecting things to be smooth and perfect every time. 

We might also have to fight through exhaustion to connect with our wife and kids. And nothing may go according to plan when we do connect, but we learn to enjoy each other’s company all the same. 

Likewise, we won’t always get to work in optimal conditions. Many times we will have to deal with the messiness of other demands and distractions while still finding a way to get our work done. 

To be sure, embracing the mess is not merely settling and becoming passive. We should work to improve our situation whenever it’s reasonable to do so. But there’s wisdom in accepting reality on its own terms and this often includes the messiness of life. 

Many things in life will be less than ideal and far from perfect, at least according to our plans. And many times this messiness is irritating to say the least. But at other times we find a deeper appreciation and value of each other through the messiness. 

In the end, life is messy and will not flow according to your clean and neat plans. Learn to embrace the mess, as this is often a sign of a well-lived life. 

Photo by Scott Umstattd on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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