Skip to main content

Death is part of life. And at times we must burn the old to allow the new to emerge. But it’s helpful to remember in these times that new birth comes from the ashes of the old. The old fertilizes the new.

To be sure, there are many times in life in which roads come to an end. Perhaps a relationship ends, a loved one dies, or it’s simply time to leave a job or our hometown. While some deaths are natural endings, others can be traumatic. Either way, something is lost – burned in the fire and never to be experienced in the same way again.

And part of what makes grief so hard is the finality of death. It’s hard to accept that something is gone forever. But life is not gone forever. Life rises once again from the ashes of death. As such, the new is not completely severed from the old, although it’s clearly not the same. Like the autumn leaves that fertilize the sprouting seedlings of spring, so the ashes of the old provide the ground from which our new life emerges.

For instance, our grief over losing a loved one will change who we are going forward. And the same is true when someone walks out of our life. Likewise, we will bring to some degree the influence from a past job or former city with us as we enter a new season.

On the hand, death marks a clear end to how things were. At the same time, we’re left forever changed. And this change is the soil that allows the new to take root.  

Of course, we don’t want to get stuck holding on to the old, as this robs us of life.  But we risk living uprooted when we pretend we can completely disconnect from all that has come before.

In the end, accept the reality of things never being the same again. But allow the ashes of the old to fertilize your rebirth into something new.


Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

Leave a Reply