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While we understand the need to mature in many areas, intentionally growing our sexual selves often gets neglected. But our sexuality only becomes a true blessing as we mature.

Unfortunately, most of us received no direct guidance in maturing our sexual selves.

While we might have been taught how babies are made, safe sex practices, and which activities are deemed appropriate and not, little attention was given to who we are as sexual beings. And much less how to grow this part of ourselves up.

Lacking intentional teachers, we were left mostly on our own to piece together what we could from friends, media, and porn.

And more often than not this has left us with an adolescent sexuality even as adults.

Our sexuality never grew beyond simply what we could get to feed our own ego.

We might have engaged in the relational dance – saying the right things and making the right moves, but we were only playing the part to get what we wanted in the end.

Immature sexuality remains shallow and egocentric. And while it’s okay to start here, we should not stay here.

We have the responsibility to grow up sexually even with few guides to show us the way.

And as we mature, our sexual expressions reflect our inner dignity.

We’re free to fully give and receive, to know and be known – and to let our sexual selves be yet another vehicle in our practice of love.

Perhaps it goes without saying that much harm is done when we remain immature – not only to ourselves and our immediate relationships, but also to those who would look to us for guidance in the future.

We can only take others as far as we have gone ourselves. And the next generation is in desperate need of better teachers.

It’s time to grow up.

Photo by Lauren Rader on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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