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Many of our friendships don’t grow beyond one or two areas of life. We enjoy doing the same things and engaging in the same conversations since we met. And for many this is good enough. But with a few we should enjoy holistic friendships – touching on multiple areas of life and willing to engage the entirety of who we are.

We have our work friends who tend to stay at work. And we know which friends to call when we want to watch the game, discuss current events, or to dive deep into pondering the mysteries of life.

And more often than not, each friend stays in his particular silo with very little overlap.

To be sure, we each have our unique gifts and perspectives. And this diversity is simply part of the village we need around us. Everyone is not expected to do everything.

At the same time, we allow for many blind spots to remain when we don’t grant a few to have full and wholehearted access to who we are.

We need friends we can joke with and also go deep, share the breakthroughs at work and the concerning matters at home, our quirky interests and those otherwise hidden places of our soul.

In short, we need holistic friendships.

There’s a part of us that remains fragmented when our friendships remain fragmented. We need relationships in which we can show up with the fullness of who we are.

Of course, we’ll still have friends who are our go-to for certain matters. But as we mature we must also intentionally cultivate holistic relationships with at least a few.

This allows us to be fully known and enjoyed as we are meant to be.

Take the risk to pursue holistic friendships and discover the rich joys and fullness of life they bring.

Photo by Marcus Wallis on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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