All relationships take work. But we make the work much harder when we lack a solid sense of who we are. A settled identity opens the door for profound intimacy throughout our life and relationships.

It’s easy to blame others or the relationship itself when we bump into relational struggles. But often our relational breakdowns are related to not knowing who we are.

Whether in romance or friendship, intimacy is allowing ourselves to be known in the presence of another. But we cannot fully offer ourselves to others if we’re out of touch with who we are.

Our lack of self-knowledge limits the depth of intimacy possible and this often leads to increase relational frustration.

And this is generally a clue it’s time to grow. What worked in one season no longer works and it’s time to take the relationship to the next level.

But relationships can grow only as far as we’ve grown individually.

Self-knowledge allows us to offer the fullness of who we are and provide a foundation for relational growth.

No longer do we have to play parts to appease others, run and hide when things get intense, or demand and control to manage our own insecurities.

When our identity is secure we have little problem allowing others to see the good, the bad, and the ugly of who we are. And we’re free to know and accept their inner world as well.

Many relational problems are avoided with this foundation in place.

To know and be known in the deepest parts of who we are keeps our relationships from getting stuck and empowers us to navigate the many seasons of life.

Strong relationships grow from solid identities.

Know who you are in order to give your best to your relationships. And in this way, self-knowledge is a practice of love.

Photo by Mary Sill on Unsplash

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