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No one likes being wronged. And generally we do whatever we can to avoid repeatedly being in this situation. While there is wisdom here, the life of faith also reminds us love keeps no receipts of being wronged. 

Of course, we don’t forget when someone has caused us harm. And naturally we learn from the past and position ourselves going forward not to remain in harm’s way, even if this means ending the harmful relationship. There’s no wisdom in returning to the same dance and expecting different results. And it’s not love to continually allow ourselves to be harmed by someone else’s sin

At the same time, we’re called to forgive one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven us. And part of forgiveness means we don’t keep receipts of their wrongdoings. 

A receipt is a record of the charges owed. And holding on to it keeps others in our debt. While we might try to move forward in the relationship, we do so with strings attached – always holding it over their heads that they still owe us. 

To be sure, part of this is self-protective because we don’t want to be harmed again. But it can also quickly lead to pride as we enjoy this one-up position over them. 

Either way, love does not keep records of being wronged. And so we must learn how to rip up the receipts when we’ve been wronged. And unlike a literal receipt, this might be something we have to do time and again. 

Even when we move to wisely protect ourselves from future harm, we don’t get to hold these past offenses against others – always seeking to collect payment from them. This is not the type of forgiveness God has extended to us. 

In the end, there’s no need to bypass the natural consequences others must face when they’ve wronged you. But the practice of love still calls us to keep no receipts of being wronged. 

Photo by Joao Viegas on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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