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There’s a sense in which we’re all born into the Matrix. Particularly in the first half of life, we simply take on the identity given to us, and dutifully fulfill the expectations imposed as well. But often, in approaching the second half of life, we start to notice glitches in the Matrix and we seek to find our way out.

To be fair, the Matrix is not all bad. It offers a lot of good and creates a space for us to start finding our way in the world. But ideally it’s just a training ground to prepare us to live in the fullness of our true and authentic selves. And we lose ourselves, and the impact we’ve been called to make, when we stay in the safe predictability of the Matrix and fail to adventure into the wild – discovering our mature freedom and power in the service of love.

This happens, for instance, when we maintain the textbook job, marriage, family life, or the like, but we’re simply going through the motions of life while being disconnected from our deep heart. On the surface, things are good and we very well might be living the “ideal life.” But something starts to nag at our soul that this is not really real – something seems off.

And often, our discontentment serves as a wake-up call to the reality of the Matrix, igniting within us a longing to experience true life.

To be sure, the path forward is usually difficult and very disruptive because we can no longer be at home in the status quo. And to others we might even appear crazy to question and desire something different. Of course, we don’t want to cause any unnecessary suffering and we must consistently check our heart motivations. But we’re also no longer willing to settle for anything less than the full reality of God’s best.

In the end, you’re not crazy when the status quo of the Matrix is no longer okay with you. Take wisdom with you and be gentle with others as you wake up and discover the wild goodness of God’s story.


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Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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