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Many things in life we can change. And many other things we cannot, no matter how much we wish otherwise. There is great wisdom in accepting simply what is – reality on its own terms.

Photo by MichaelGaida on Pixabay

Accepting reality does not mean we settle or have to sell ourselves short. If change can be made, we should invest our energy into making this change.

In fact, much of our life is a journey of change as we are growing and being transformed into the best versions of ourselves.

At the same time, many things in life are constant. For example, we cannot change our past, and our personality quirks also remain pretty consistent.

It is unlikely that a night owl will become an early bird, or that an extrovert will become an introvert.

There are also many things simply outside of our control.

We cannot make someone drive faster or become a fan of our favorite brand. 

When faced with unchangeable realities, acceptance goes a long way.

We only frustrate ourselves when we keep expecting a different result from a situation that is not changing.

In relationships, it can be difficult to determine if someone is simply too stubborn to change or if their operating system truly cannot compute the change desired.

In any case, change is not happening and acceptance is called for on our part.

One of the most gracious things we can do for each other is accepting the reality of what is.

Befriending reality frees us from the frustration of unrealistic expectations and allows us to decide how to respond.

While we cannot change reality, we can change ourselves in relationship with it. What is God up to in my life as I face this unchangeable circumstance?

There is much serenity in accepting what is. Reality is your friend.

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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