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What if our sexuality is more than what we do with our genitals?

When sexuality is reduced to genital expressions it is often then assumed sexual improvement is only about learning better sex techniques.

Certainly, there is nothing wrong with learning better techniques, and it can be a mark of maturity to focus on this area of growth. At the same time, truly growing into the sexual men God has created us to be involves much more than learning advance techniques. It requires a holistic view of our sexuality.

For starters, it is helpful to step back and remember our sexuality has more to do with who we are as males and females, which is not limited to our genital expressions.

As men we get to reflect God’s divine image through our masculine nature. To be sure, this does not deny the feminine qualities we also possess, but, in general, we display the masculine qualities of God.

Men reveal the strength of God.

When Scripture speaks of God saving his people with his mighty right hand, this is an image we “get” because we know the physical image of masculine strength.

The male body tends to have more muscle mass and is physically stronger than the average female body. While of course there are exceptions, God is showing us something in the way he designed the masculine form, namely his strength on our behalf.

As such, part of being an authentic sexual man is using our strength on behalf of others. While this may include physically doing the heavy lifting for others, this is more than having a strong body.

Being strong may also mean providing a shoulder for someone to lean on, thoughtfully directing the management of resources, fighting for the welfare of others, or providing a spiritual covering for others through prayer.

To take this concept of strength a step farther, consider what God is showing us in how he crafted the penis.

When aroused, the penis becomes strong and erect, like a rock or a strong tower. And for conception to take place, a man must rise to the occasion, offer his strength, and spill himself. If he does not, new life does not happen.

This is more than a lesson on how babies are made. God is revealing the art of masculinity.

As men, wherever new life is needed, we are called to offer our generative power and strength. Whenever we hold back, life stagnates.

This is true at work, in friendship, marriage, parenting, and even in our spiritual walk.

There is a way things work. God has design our existence in such a way that new life comes when we offer the strength he has given us. If we’re in a dead-end job or a stale marriage, it may be because we have not faithfully offered our strength in some meaningful way.

Learning how to offer our strength in every area of life is how we reflect God’s image and become the sexual men he created us to be. And while our bodies and genitals provide a concrete example of what this looks like, this is much more than mere physical expressions; it includes our entire being.

What areas of your life need more vitality?

Become the sexual man God is proud to call his son by reflecting his life-giving strength in every area of life.

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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