For better or worse, we learn how to do life by watching and observing those around us. And this includes who we become as sexual beings. It’s good to regularly consider who has served us as role models and if better examples are now needed.
It’s no surprise we pick up certain quirks, perspectives, and approaches to life from those around us.
God has wired us to readily adapt to various situations and our wellbeing often depends on adjusting to the norms around us.
But this is not absolute and we also have the freedom to go against the status quo and align our lives with deeper truths important to us.
The problem is that we’re rarely conscious to most of the stories we tell ourselves about how life works. We just assume whatever we picked up is how it’s supposed to be.
And sensitive areas like sexuality are even less likely to be questioned.
This can leave us frustrated and confused when we bump into problems and we’re not even aware of our internal operating system.
And certainly growing into our potential also requires us to know what foundation we’re building on.
This is where considering our role models can prove helpful.
For many, it’s much easier to name our negative models than positive ones. But in either case, it’s good to consider what those around us taught us about being a sexual man.
When this has been negative we can now intentionally find better models to emulate. And when this has been positive we can express our gratitude and now consider if these are still the ones to lead us to our next level of growth.
In the end, we still learn through relationship with others. And growing into the fullness of our sexuality requires us to find many role models along the way.
Consider the role models you’ve had and if it’s time to find new ones.