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Generally speaking, we all like pulling our own weight and not being a burden to others. And while we might readily come through for others in their time of need, all too often we’re still reluctant for someone to do this for us. But both humility and wisdom call for us to share our burdens to experience God’s best.

It’s clear some are lazy and expect others to do for them. They load others down with their burdens rather than taking mature responsibility for themselves.

And perhaps, not wanting to take advantage of others in this way, we go to the other extreme and attempt to bear our burdens alone.

And, to be sure, pride and fear are often at play as well.

It’s pride that keeps us in the one-up position of helping others rather than allowing them to also serve us.

But it’s fear that holds us back when we doubt the other will truly care for us in our time of need.

We fear not being lovable enough – that perhaps others will tolerate us if we don’t ask too much, but might leave if they also have to deal with our struggles.

On the surface, holding back seems noble. But in reality we’re often just playing it safe and hiding.

It’s risky to share our undone and vulnerable parts. Some indeed are not safe and many are simply immature. And unfortunately, opening up might lead them to pull away and withdraw.

But there are those willing to bear our burdens and it’s our fear that holds us back.

We might share surface issues, but we don’t take the risk to go deeper – sharing the true wrestlings of our soul.

And, in the end, we can’t experience the fullness of love when we don’t share our whole heart and struggles.

Continue to pull your own weight throughout your life and relationships. And allow trusted others to enter into your struggles as well.

We need regular doses of true love and acceptance where we fear it the most.

Photo by Timo Stern on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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