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The big and important matters of life are hard to ignore and naturally we want to bring our best to these moments. But these opportunities are often dependent on how we handle the smaller matters. When we’re not faithful in the small things we likely won’t have what it takes to be trusted with the weightier matters.

For instance, kids are prone to ask a million questions about things that don’t seem particularly important to us as adults. Why is the sky blue? What’s the curved pipe under the sink for? Why do people grow hair in funny places?

At first, it might be tempting to just dismiss their questions as childish curiosity not to be taken seriously. And, to be sure, we don’t want to read more into the moment than what’s necessary. 

But how we handle these “small” questions sets the relational foundation for all their future questions with us. And tending to these small matters shows we can be trusted with the bigger and deeper matters of their hearts as they grow up. 

And this remains true throughout our life and relationships.

Whether in marriage or friendship, at work or in serving our communities, the neglect of small matters will eventually hinder our impact on the bigger things. 

For example, in many respects, it’s the mundane, everyday matters with our family and friends that build the currency needed for the larger asks. And while we might still show up for the big things, we’re more prone to bitterness and resentment when consistency in the small matters has not been established. 

Of course, there are priorities and we must wisely discern how much attention to give to what issue. And certainly this is not to focus so much on the small things that we neglect the weightier matters. But the small things still matter as well. 

In the end, when you’re careless with the small matters of a person’s life they likely won’t trust you with the bigger issues later. Show that the small things matter to build the trust needed to enter the deeper waters of each other’s souls.

Photo by Bambi Corro on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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