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There are things worth fighting for and our natural tendency often relies on brute force to bring about change. And while a full-court press is needed at times, we must also learn the wisdom of the gentle warrior.

There’s a certain simplicity in addressing issues head on. Being direct and very matter-of-fact leaves little room to question the change we want to see.

At the same time, we loose our effectiveness when we become overly aggressive in our approach.

The proverbial bull in the china shop does more damage than good.

And it’s not that our desires are bad. Perhaps more often than not our heart is in the right spot regarding the change we want to see.

What needs shifting is our approach.

The gentle warrior still fights for what is good and right, but takes a softer, subtler approach.

And, maybe said another way, he plays the long game. Rather than demanding complete and immediate change, the gentle warrior is able to take his time in learning what’s important to the other and caring for their point of view.

He doesn’t give up on his vision and the change he seeks to bring. But he’s also able to listen, empathize, and bless others along the way – sharing his heart only to the extent the other is able to receive. He doesn’t overwhelm them with his agenda, however well meaning.

This is not as quick as the direct approach. But it brings lasting change without causing unnecessary damage in the process – the dripping water that eventually cracks the boulder instead of the jackhammer.

When we’re consistently hitting a brick wall in our efforts to bring change, it’s likely time to switch our approach.

The gentle warrior fights with much patience and kindnessgrace and daily courage.

Don’t give up on what is good and right. But learn to fight also as a gentle warrior.

Photo by Ivan Dostál on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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