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Many things we do without thinking. They’ve simply become habits and we do them automatically. But while habits have their place, this should not be at the cost of our freedom to love well in each moment.

Of course, there are many things we do habitually – from our sleep schedule and the food we eat, to the path we take to work and where we sit on Sunday morning.

And, for the most part, our habits are a nonissue. They save us from having to consciously make the same decision in repeated situations. And this gives us the bandwidth to care for other needs.

But our habits become a problem when they rob us of our freedom – when we’ve essentially become enslaved to them that we’re no longer free to decide how we show up in a given moment.

For instance, we might habitually surf the Internet, check our email, or otherwise engage in our guilty pleasures.

While the content of our habit might not be inherently wrong, it becomes an issue when we’re no longer free to be fully present and to love in that moment.

This happens when our habits blind us to the needs around us and even to the deep movements of our own heart. We live on autopilot and struggle to understand the growing frustration, loneliness, and despair building inside. And we might also shake our heads as we wonder how our life got so far off course.

Whatever it looks like, we must learn to make our habits work for us and not the other way around. And while we don’t always consciously choose our habits, we must remain ever open to any habitual thoughts or behaviors that rob us of our freedom.

In the end, let your habits serve you without stealing away your freedom to love well in each moment.

Photo by Indivar Kaushik on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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