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Every issue is not helpful to bring up. And many others are rightly dismissed and quickly forgotten. But some things need to be addressed and ignoring the elephant in the room only makes matters worse. Naming these elephants allows us to bring issues into the light and find the healing and peace we desire.

Of course, every relationship has its share of hurts, wounds, and many misunderstandings. And part of love is not keeping a record of these wrongs – to forgive as we have been forgiven and to make amends every chance we get.

But our willingness to overlook offenses is not the same as ignoring issues.

We’re only faking the peace when in the name of love we pretend there’s no issue when really there is one.

Ignoring the elephant in the room doesn’t make it go away. In fact, we still have to navigate around it while pretending everything is okay. And this can just make matters more awkward and difficult for everyone.

Resentment and bitterness is more likely to take root. And we’re also more tempted to simply cut off from relationships rather than dealing honestly with the unaddressed issues between us.

To be fair, it’s often tough and perhaps even embarrassing to finally address issues that have long been ignored. Many are layered and complex and don’t have simple solutions.

But this is a situation in which the more we ignore the elephant the more we actually feed it and it grows.

It’s only in naming the elephants and bringing them out into the light that we keep from making mountains out of molehills.

Don’t allow the important issues of your life and relationships to remain hidden and fester.  Find peace and healing by naming the elephants and bringing them into the light.

Photo by Jesse Schoff on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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