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We have a vision and we know the good we want to lead others into. But sometimes in our zeal we become more concerned with pushing our agenda than with connecting with the hearts of those we seek to lead. And this often leads to disconnection and frustration for all.

To be sure, part of leadership is casting a vision and guiding others into uncharted territories. We see the good we want them to enjoy and we’re committed to helping them move in this direction.

But we must not rush ahead and miss the very hearts of those we want to lead.

This happens, for instance, when we spend all our time talking about how great and important our vision is without connecting it to the hearts and lives of others.

Issues that are not personally relevant are not generally entertained for long regardless of how important they might actually be. 

And it tends to rub people the wrong way when we try to guilt and pressure them into adopting our desires for their life.

Our agenda seems more important than their heart. And this tends to push them away.

We don’t usually follow those who don’t actively and consistently show they care for us. 

To lead well, we must ensure we’re faithfully seeking to serve the other and not merely pushing our own agenda, fueled by pride.

How might the vision God has given us connect with the deep desires God has put into their hearts as well? 

It’s likely we want to go in the same direction. But we must take the time to know and connect before leading.

And our disappointment and sense of rejection is often because we’ve missed their hearts.

Hold firm to the vision God has given you. And don’t forget to personally care for the hearts of the very ones you seek to lead.

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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