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It’s tempting to find someone to blame for the setbacks and misfortunes that come our way. And perhaps many times there is someone to blame. But it’s also true that life just happens and there’s not always anyone to blame.

To be sure, there are many things in this life not as it should be, and accidents are prone to happen.

And, without a doubt, it’s important to consider and hold responsible parties accountable.

At the same time, there’s not always someone to blame for the troubles we face.

Sometimes our misfortunes are simply the result of our own previous choices. We exercised our freedom to turn right or turn left and must now deal with whatever obstacles this path now entails.

At other times, we can make all the right choices and just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Whatever the case, it’s only natural to be angry whenever we’re the victims of life’s injustices and we’re burdened with realities we didn’t choose for ourselves. And if we could just find someone to blame, then maybe we wouldn’t have to bear the burden alone.

But sometimes life is simply not fair. And we must learn to lament and grieve when we go through the misfortunes of life.

This is not how it should be. But this is how it is. And we must accept this reality on its own terms and keep moving forward.

Crying over spilled milk doesn’t change the reality of the next steps we need to take.

And constantly looking for someone to blame doesn’t move us forward either.

In the end, even when life is not fair, we have the responsibility to continue answering God’s call for our life. Even through our misfortunes we trust God is still at work and nothing is ultimately wasted.

Accept the misfortunes of life without getting stuck in trying to assign blame. Be angry and grieve. And then get back to work accomplishing all God has created you to do.

Photo by Road Trip with Raj on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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