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Integrity is living life consistent with our deep values and beliefs. While our roles change, our deep convictions are not violated from one situation to the next. And a litmus test of our integrity is whether or not we have to keep aspects of our life secret from those closest to us.

It’s clear everyone doesn’t need to know everything and many aspects of our story are rightly private. But those in our inner circle either have the right or the privilege to know the whole truth of who we are.

For instance, generally speaking, if something needs forgiving it needs to be confessed.

Secret sins continue and become a stronghold in our life when we keep them hidden – when we don’t confess to the trusted allies around us.

Sin thrives in darkness and bringing it into the light robs it of much of its power.

We’re more prone to compromise our integrity whenever our actions are kept secret from those closest to us.

And this test of secrecy often serves as a good heart check for our decisions.

For example, there’s probably something wrong if we’ve made a new connection at the gym or spending extra time with a colleague at work and cannot tell our wife about it.

Likewise, something is likely off when we go out of our way to keep our spending habits, travel, or daily whereabouts hidden.

Again, everything doesn’t have to be shared. But a red flag should go up whenever we feel we have to keep parts of our life secret.

Secrecy sets us up to compromise our integrity, which in turn invites much harm and pain throughout our life and relationships.

Live with your integrity. And let a litmus test be whether or not you have to keep things hidden in secrecy.

Photo by Ali Yahya on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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