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Occasionally, we seek to persuade others to see as we do. And it’s wonderful when we can enjoy a new shared perspective together. However, when we major in the minors it can cost us many relationships.

When something is important to us we naturally want to share it with others. And certainly any thoughtful and honest person would come to the same conclusion we did.

But this is not always the case.

Many good and loving individuals hold vastly different perspectives on the issues of life.

And even individuals within the same family or marriage can hold radically different views on politics and the exercise of religion, for instance.

But unfortunately, when we major in the minors, we let these differences divide us.

To be sure, some things are worth fighting for and deep convictions might rightly cost us certain relationships.

But often we’re fighting over minor issues and missing the more important ones.

For example, if the point of a holiday gathering is to spend time together as a family, it matters little what’s on the menu.

The menu can be discussed and even passionately debated, but never to the point of causing the family not to get together.

The point is quality time. And the menu is a minor issue only intended to assist toward this end. The menu is not the point.

So even if our version of the menu is the best in every respect, we must not become a bully and drive others away because they desire something different.

Admittedly, it’s often very difficult to see beyond the menu when it’s been the focus for so long.

But we must dig deeper to keep the main thing the main thing.

Don’t let majoring in the minors keep you from the more important things in your life and relationships.

Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash

Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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