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Despite our best intentions, every desire doesn’t live to see the light of day. In fact, many of our efforts die before being birthed into the fullness of life. And, in big and small ways, these miscarriages of life still matter and need to be honored in their own right.

Of course, we understand the heartache involved when a couple experiences a pregnancy loss. All of their hopes, dreams, desires, and plans for their child are gone in an instant. And they’re essentially powerless to do anything to stop it. This is simply one of life’s many tragedies that must be humbly endured and accepted.

At the same time, miscarriages are not limited to pregnancy loss.

We experience a miscarriage any time a particular desire of our heart dies before coming into the fullness of life.

For example, this can be as simple as pouring our heart and soul into a project only for it to be scrapped or otherwise canceled before it’s even launched.

Or, we might make great efforts to invest in friendships only for them to fizzle out and never really get off the ground.

Likewise, this might play out in failed work and romantic pursuits, cooking a meal that gets ruined before we get a chance to eat it, or in an injury that keeps us from pursuing a dream.

Whatever it looks like, the miscarriages of life are a premature death or ending to something we desired.

We start a race while being robbed of the chance to cross the finish line.

It’s not what we expected and we must now grieve what was never fully realized.

And it’s in grieving and naming our loss that we honor our experience and keep our hearts open to all the life God still has for us.

Without a doubt, the miscarriages of life suck in whatever form they take. Remember to care for your soul as you grieve your loss.

In the end, death does not have the final word in our story.

Photo by Daniel Jensen on Unsplash


Dr. Corey Carlisle

Licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist - providing Christian counseling and soul care to individuals and couples, with a special emphasis on developing the masculine soul. Suwanee, GA 30024

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