Love is eager to learn about the other in order to bring their good. What are their likes and dislikes? Their fears and secret desires? What makes them sad and what brings them joy? Love grows by staying curious.
It is possible to love strangers – our common humanity compels us toward acts of lovingkindness on their behalf.
At the same time, for love to have that personal touch, we must know the other personally.
Showering someone with gifts, for example, when their primary love language is quality time does not communicate love in a way they can readily receive.
Our well-meaning attempts still leave the other feeling missed, uncared for, and unloved in the ways that matter most to them.
Knowing what matters to the other allows us to love them well. As such, we must remain curious.
What do you notice? Where do they find life?
As we discover more of their heart, we can target our love to speak into the deep and unique places of their soul.
Perhaps we express our care for a particular situation they are concerned with or help them to dream about a future aspiration. Maybe we find that perfect gift and get it just because we know it would mean the world to them.
Whatever it looks like, it takes knowledge about the other to love them well.
Stay curious and seek to truly know those around you.
Curiosity allows you to grow in your practice of love and allows others to feel seen and cared for in the ways that matter most to them.